Astronaut5: Reckless + Expecting

Dean's gaze softened. He blindly searched for Castiel's hand, to take a gentle hold of it, squeezing it to make his soulmate look at him again. "Hey. I know I have been kind of distant lately, but you have no fault. I could never be angry to you about what happened - who even knows how it happened anyway. And I love you."

Castiel seemed really, really relieved when he looked back at Dean. At least, the news took off such a burden off his chest that he gently dragged Dean down for a long, desperate kiss.

Dean kissed Castiel back just as desperately, but gently, cupping his cheeks in a soft gesture. He caressed his face, feeling weirdly relieved himself. He ended the kiss just to kiss his forehead. "You should get back to sleep", he repeated with a small smile. "You need to rest. And so do I - I do't even know when was the last time I actually slept for good."

Castiel nodded and, for the first time in a while, he wrapped his arms around Dean, to sleep clodr to him. "Goodnight, Dean."

"Goodnight Cas", Dean murmured back, wrapping his arms around the angel. He didn't take long to fall asleep - but he took advantage of the fact that his soulmate had fallen asleep first to slowly slide down and lay his head on his belly. You know. Just in case the child felt like being happy again.

Aww!!
And the baby did feel happy again the next morning, so much that Cas woke up early. He smiled softly, and looked at Dean fondly for a while, not daring to wake him up.

Dean was snoring peacefully as he rested on Castiel's belly. At least, he was, until he could feel that slow, nice rush of happiness pervading him. He blinked, slowly waking up, hiding a yawn behind a hand. He lifted his gaze to meet his soulmate's and smiled back at him. "Hey", he murmured.

"Hey," Castiel replied with a soft smile. He ran a hand through Dean's hair, as he looked fondly both at him and his belly. "Did you sleep well tonight?"

Dean leaned into his touch, still a bit sleepy. "Yeah", he answered, almost surprised about it. "You?" He brought a hand to his soulmate's belly, to rub against it. He felt... at peace, that morning. Amazing.

"I did," Castiel confirmed. He kept on caressing Dean's hair for a little while, simply happy to let that moment linger on. "Do you still feel our child?"

Dean nodded. "Yes", he answered, pressing his ear briefly against Castiel's belly, before looking back at him again, a smile on his lips. "I think... I think she likes me."

Castiel's face lit up with a bright smile. "It's a girl?" He held back a chuckle, and pressed his lips together, suddenly overwhelmed with an outburst of affection for both Dean and their daughter. "I have never felt it before," he explained, moved by the news.

Dean felt surprised that he had been the first to feel something like that. He didn't even know how he knew - he just did. Those coos she made, maybe. "I am almost sure she is", he said with a smile, deciding to prop himself up to kiss Castiel on the mouth, gently. He looked back at his belly again. "Am I right, kid?"

"I think she agrees with you," Castiel replied, as he felt their daughter cooing back at Dean. "Perhaps we could... find her a name soon," he suggested in a whisper.

Dean nodded absently, listening to the coos of that little creature. "We will do that." He bit his lower lip, keeping silent for a bit, before letting out in a low voice, "I am still scared, Cas."

"... About what, Dean?" Castiel shifted slightly so he could turn towards his soulmate, laying a hand on his arm.

Dean took a deep breath. "... what if - what if I don't know how to... be a parent", he asked flatly. "I didn't have the greatest examples. My mom wasn't around for long enough, and my father..." He bit his lower lip, getting silent. "I don't want to become like him. Maybe you'd both deserve better than a man that until yesterday didn't even have the courage to touch your belly."

"..." Castiel brought Dean closer, and kissed his temple, as he guided his hand on his belly again, so he could feel their daughter. "Both her and I deem you more than worthy of our love, Dean. I know it's been hard to you lately. All of this... wasn't planned, but I do believe we will both be able to rely on each other, rather than on the parenting models we didn't have." Chuck wasn't a prime example of parenting either, especially when it came down to angels.

Dean kept his eyes on Castiel as he spoke, even if his hand was still on his belly. He bit his lower lip again. "Why do I even deserve you", he simply answered before leaning in to steal a long, loving and desperate kiss.

Castiel eagerly kissed Dean back for a while, before he finally broke their kiss from some air, laying his forehead against Dean's. "I love you," he whispered softly, caressing his cheek. Damn, it felt good to know that Dean still loved him, and somehow... loved their child enough to worry about being good enough for her.

"I love you too", Dean murmured back breathlessly, stealing one last peck from his mouth. "And - I promise I'm done being a dick from now on. I want to care for you. For... for both of you."

Castiel nodded softly. "I'm sure you will," he whispered back, as he nuzzled happily against Dean.

A few more weeks later, Castiel came to Eileen in the library. It had taken him a lot of thinking beforehand to do so, but he was now confident about the offer he was about to make her. He stood in front of her, and signed, as he spoke, "Eileen, I wish to speak to you."

Eileen, who had been wandering through the bunker reading a book about, ironically enough, children care, stopped on her tracks, blinking. She closed her book, tucking it under her arm to sign, "Sure. Is something wrong? Are you alright?"

Castiel nodded. "I- I've been thinking about my failure to get you your hearing back," he signed a bit awkwardly. He still felt guilty for that false hope he had given her already.